It’s hard to have clarity about what you want from life when all the so-called answers are coming from the outside. Knowing your true path can only come from the inside. But if you don’t have a connection to your inner self, you are never going to get the clarity you want.
No one else can tell you what’s right for you. You can follow the prescribed paths of what is supposedly “right” but it doesn’t mean that it’s right for you. When you’ve followed prescribed paths for too long, you have severely limited your capacity to see what’s right for you, much less believe in your choices. It’s a natural outcome of suppressing your impulses in the service of achieving goals. Which is not a bad thing, unless that’s the only thing you can do.
Letting go of the “have to”
Being able to let go of your “have to” can be tough. Especially when your ability to achieve has built your confidence. But what happens when you’re not doing what you’re “supposed” to do? Does your confidence from seeking achievement transfer to your ability to choose for yourself? In other words, can you enjoy life without a task to complete?
Without following someone else’s prescribed path, you tend to lose interest. You’re looking for the next thing to achieve, but you’re not sure how that achievement will be useful in your life.
Be your own authority
The only way to get clarity and experience your achievements as meaningful is to be your own authority. To do that, you must tune into your impulses and act on them.
That’s not to say you should be irresponsible. It means that you start a practice that allows you to fully notice and act upon your impulses.
This practice can be as simple as paying attention to your feelings when you make a choice about what food you want, or what clothing you feel like wearing. When you practice in simple ways like this, you build your capacity to notice the sensations in your body that motivate your choices. It is this capacity to notice your sensations that is the foundation of being your own authority. It is also the trick to having clarity about the bigger things in your life.
What having clarity looks like
When you are authentically motivated by your own impulses, you will have the clarity you are looking for. You will be able to make choices about what’s right for you, and you will know why you make those choices. The things you do will not be a mystery anymore.
Any resistance you get from others to conform to their standards will be easy to stand up to because you are confident in your own choices. Ridicule or humiliation used to try and sway your decisions will be weak against your confidence.
Clarity looks like a life where you enjoy what you’re doing because you know why you’re doing it and it has meaning for you. Your choices are in line with the overall goals you have for your life.